E93: Re-Release: Becoming A Woman of Influence
**This episode was transcribed by Otter.ai, so please forgive any spelling errors.
Dr. Seida 0:17
You're listening to the Loveish podcast, and I'm your host Seida. Hood, a licensed clinical social worker. Each week, I'm going to help you to develop the belief and strategy necessary to make an immediate impact on the world by deep diving into topics like mental wellness, faith, relationships, and love. I should mention before we hop into the show, this is not a substitute for our relationship with a licensed therapist. You ready? Let's get it.
Dr. Seida 0:54
Welcome back for another episode of the Loveish podcast, it is your host Seida hood, Vision architect and licensed therapist. Your influence is the most powerful tool you have. With this in mind, you have to use it wisely. I know. I know, I hear you. You feel like no one actually listens to you. You feel like you have a message to share and you know is important. But you don't feel heard. You don't feel seen. You've tried to hop on these lip tic tac trans Instagram reels and make the cute little app. Video. But let's be real, that does not get much play. Because first of all, you can't even figure out how to make the words pop up and then disappear when you want them to. Or you keep losing all your footage. Or maybe you think to yourself, I just need another course or another program that's going really like tighten me up or the best coach to help me figure out what my message is. I really do think that what I do is important. But it's just one problem. I can't really describe what it is I do. I kind of know that I carry influence, but I just can't really figure out what it is in me that other people are actually attracted to. Remember when you were in middle school or high school and somebody made you mad? And then you carried your anger home and use like let me call God one of my favorite is to tell him what happened. I don't talk like you've never been there. You Menlo shady now leadless. Let's be honest. So you called a friend. And you told them what happened? And then they reassured you Oh, no doubt the other person was definitely bogus. And after that, y'all went on to decide whether consciously or subconsciously, how to treat the other person. Maybe you decided to sit at a different table the next day at lunch, or you decided that you would leave the house a little bit early, instead of waiting until 805 like you usually do. So the three of you could walk to school together. Let's say maybe a day or two later, the person starts to notice that you and a crow was really acting kind of funny. So maybe they asked you about it. And you just shrug it off. And you say I really just been busy. No one, good. And Duggal? Well, your feelings were hurt. And instead of taking the time to resolve the issue, you use your influence to change the dynamics of an entire relationship. Now, yes, a lot of us did that in middle school or high school. But let's be clear, let's be clear here. Some of y'all still don't want it today. Can we be honest, can we be honest, honest. That's called influence. You have the power to influence someone's entire mood, their day, their perspective, and that is powerful. The problem is you haven't figured out how to use the influence in the areas that you actually want to be influential. Another problem is you haven't really honed in on who you want to be and the type of impact you want to have on people's lives. I know that's how you've been feeling. Because I used to be just Just like you, the truth is, in
Dr. Seida 5:03
order to become a woman of influence, you're going to have to look at the influence that you will did in the past, you're going to have to heal from your past mistakes so that you can see with a clear lens, and then you're going to have to make a choice on the type of impact you want to have. First off, what is influence? You already know, we're going to travel to Google for this one, right? Okay, so influence me is the capacity to have an effect on the character development or behavior of someone or something, or you are the very effect itself. I know the term influencer has gotten so watered down in the past couple of years. And at this point, we want to see people who are actually using their influence in different ways that really impact our lives. But you've been influenced to make choices that you've made for your entire life, well, beyond or well, before social media influencers became a thing, you have also carried influence for your entire life, you just didn't realize it. From this perspective, the perspective that you've always been a woman of influence, the question now shifts to what type of influence you've been carrying? Have you been carrying positive influence? Have you been positively influencing people to follow their dreams, invest in their relationships and pursue their dreams? Have you been doing that? Or have you carried negative influence, jacking up relationships, gossiping, spreading lies for your own benefit, and turning people against each other? Now I get that it's really hard to be honest about this one. But truly, if you are committed to becoming a woman of influence, you have to take a look in the mirror and see what the truth is about who you have been. Perhaps you didn't actually set out to become this person. Maybe life just pushed you into becoming somebody that you don't even recognize. And if that's the case, you can choose to be different today. Maybe you've carried neutral or muted influence. And this is one of the most dangerous types of influence because it leaves people to assume they understand your heart, when in reality, you could feel totally opposite. For example, if I think that Roe versus Wade being overturned is absolutely ridiculous, and inconsiderate of women's rights, and all the work that was done over the past few years. But I say nothing. When my friend is questioning this being overturned, and trying to make a decision on how to vote for the next candidate. There could be an assumption of agreement. So based on my assumption, that you agree, I could vote that it'd be overturned, right? If I believe that, you know, well, you're kind of quiet. I'm bringing this up. And as I'm bringing it up based on things that I know about you and your history and who you are, I assume you agree with this overturning and I really value your input and your opinion. Maybe I vote according to it being overturned. Makes sense. We just have to be very careful about our influence our words, our actions. Okay, I want to switch gears a little bit and talk about becoming a woman of influence. But first, we're gonna pause right here and have a word from our sponsor for this episode. Hey, I got a question for you. What are you doing August 25? At 7pm Central Standard Time? Nothing. Okay, cool. I want to invite you to join me for the Loveish podcast anniversary episode. Yes,
Dr. Seida 9:29
we turn one this month. I can't even believe that it's been a whole year of these podcast episodes, hearing from you recording these episodes live answering your questions. So in celebration of the podcast turning one, I'm going to be hosting a live show. Best part you get to be a part of the show. So we will be featuring live q&a. You can come on camera if you want or you can just submit your questions in the chat. And then we're going to be engaging in one of my favorite things to do give away ways in order to be chosen for giveaway though, you've got to register. So if you're interested in joining me for this anniversary episode, click the link in the show notes and sign up to register so that you can get the link your exclusive RSVP pass to join me in this recording. All right, I hope I'll see you there talk soon, bye.
Dr. Seida 10:37
Hi, do you find yourself frequently frustrated struggling to communicate your emotions to the people around you? Are you finding that you got so much bottled up on the inside of you that you can't really communicate? Do you frequently find yourself frustrated almost as if you want to pull out your hair, because nobody seems to understand you. If this is you, I want to invite you to my latest workshop journaling for mental wellness. Now I know you are probably overthinking journaling, you're gonna say you've tried journaling 50 million times, and you can never seem to get the habit to stick. Trust me, I hear you, I want to invite you to this very special workshop, because I'm going to teach you all the basics of journaling, we're going to identify your journaling style, your journaling type, and then I'm going to give you a specific plan for plug and play where you can incorporate journaling for your mental wellness into your lifestyle. Now what what this workshop be if it wasn't full of prompts, and thoughts and ideas, and journal starting things, right? So I'm gonna give you all of those tips, all of those tools inside of this workshop. Alright, so how to actually become a woman of influence, I'm always going to encourage you to look in the mirror, decide on the type of person that you want to be and decide how you want to live your life moving forward. So you know, in my profession, I am a licensed therapist. So I will always believe in a person's ability to change and shift their entire life might take a little bit of work, but it is entirely possible. In order to decide on something that's major, then we have to look at the type of influence that you've wielded in the past. Like I said a little bit earlier in this episode. I know we talked about positive, negative and neutral influence, but we have to look at the reality of what we've done. So when I'm trying to think about who I want to be, I have to look at who I've been, you can start by answering these questions. Once you have a specific situation in mind, what was the outcome? Who benefited from my influence in that particular situation? Who or what has been the consequence of negative influence? Again, therapists here, so I'm always going to tell you to heal, heal what you need to heal so that you can become who you want to become. Healing looks very different for everybody. For some people healing looks like going to see a therapist. For others, it might be about separating yourself from people things habits, it might be getting deliverance, or any combination of all of these things. The bottom line here is that you cannot run away from your healing. You can't run away from who you've been in the past, you have to acknowledge those things. You can't become a woman of influence with a stained glass perspective. You have to heal so you can see things outside of a trauma lens outside of a victim role outside of those things. You want to be able to have a fresh outlook on life. And in order to do that you have to he'll determined to be the woman of influence today. And ask yourself the following questions when you're making decisions. What would the woman of influence I'm aiming to be do in this situation? How would she handle this situation? With a woman of influence I'm aiming to be make this choice? What factors would she consider? Again, you're already a woman of influence, but you have to actually decide the type of impact you'd like to have
Dr. Seida 15:01
It's time to talk about what I've been loving product recommendations, shout outs to family and friends and overall gratitude. Let's get into it. All right, welcome back to the part of the show where I talk to you about little things that have been bringing my heart joy. I have been loving the changing weather. I do enjoy summer but my absolute favorite top tier season II is the fall. I am Uber thirsty for a fall and I've already started my fall bucket list. jajah Mama, if you got a problem with that. All right, in today's episode of the Loveish podcast, we talked about how you already carry influence how to become a greater woman of influence. And if you want to become a greater woman of influence, you're going to have to look at the influence you've wielded in the past or the power that you have wielded in the past, you're going to have to take the time to heal, and then you're going to have to decide the type of impact you'd like to have. That is all I have for you today in this episode. If you enjoyed the episode, share the love share which a mama share with your auntie share with a best friend and then head on over to Apple podcasts and leave a five star review reviews help the podcast to grow. Well that is all I have for you today. I will see you out on these social media streets.
Transcribed by https://otter.ai
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